Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Hyperbole and Jesus

I love this blog, see, hyperbole and a half, despite the foul language.

So this morning I was reading a new post.

I wish I'd known mom was reading over my shoulder for part of it.

I was totally inspired by the new post anyway, so I decited to also put on a preformance of the Christ. But Mom wouldn't approve if I tried to show the crucifying part, so had to wait to begin preparing.

I finally found the oppertunity.

So I started with a Mary costume.

My sister had taken the longest coat in the house to school (I'm on break a day early) and there weren't very many robes that I was allowed to use. So I decided to use a Snuggy that my grandmother had made. So I took off my pajama top and slipped on my Snuggy. Then I got some of my mom's homemade bread for one of the Wiseman gifts. Then I decided to act all groggy from pregnancy. Somehow I don't think it was the best Mary ever.

Next I needed some Wisemen costumes. I found a lot of cool stuff, but even if I carried only one thing at a time I'd be squished under its weight. So I decided to get into shape. I got my heavy baseball bat and ran around the house. I wasn't having that much fun, so I put on a deranged smile.

So I sort of had to push the stuff up the basmenet steps as it turned out, but I had my wisemen costumes.

Then I needed a Shepherd. I didn't exacly get what a Shepherd was until later, so I put on something that was cute, yet uneccesary.

I got all the animals using my stuffed animals of course, but I had a little trouble with baby Jesus.

I was pretty much bored with the idea by now, but I had all this stuff out, so I formed a new plan to show mom when she came home instead of an impressive preformance of the Christ.

Yep. I had tea with the Lord. But then the unthinkabale happened.

I kicked the teapot and it flew through the air and when it landed it shattered. Imaginary tea flooded the floor. These teapot things were only 15 cents ecah, but I was sobbing.

ME: Oh noooo! The Lord was knocked over!

ME: Oh noooo! The tea has spilled!

Me, running around house: NOOOOOOO!!!

Me, abruptly stopping: I suppose I could always go back to the Christ play.

And that's exacly what did. Just then I heard something.

I then decided to take the liberty of playing the angel too.

Happy holidays! From,
--Jane Cooper Age 10


  1. OMG. Jane this is great.

    Tiny Tyrant

  2. Did you delete my earlier comment or did I just forget to post it?

    Anyway, I was trying to tell you that I appreciate your amazing sense of humor and I'm also glad that you fictionalized this somewhat. I would hate to still be cleaning up shards from a tea pot...